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just a girl living the expat life

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Bill Maher

August 23, 2011 filed under: cracks me up, good times, my so-called life


© Randy Miramontez (on Sacramento Press).


We had tickets to Bill Maher on Friday night.

Holy goodness.

It’s been one of the best comedy shows I’ve ever been to.

To my absolute delight, we found out that we had seats in the 5th row from the stage. (I wasn’t even aware that I had purchased such good seats until we got to the venue.) Comedy is much better, the closer you sit to the stage. Obviously. And we weren’t disappointed.

There was no warm up act that was followed by a lukewarm, lackadaisical 45 minute-show. Not that I expected that from someone like Bill Maher anyway, because I think he’s serious about everything he does. But from the very moment that he walked on stage, he owned the place and he had fun doing so. For over 1,5 hours he skewered the GOP candidates, the Tea Party, religious fanaticism and underlined the importance of equal rights and integrity.

I think Bill Maher is one of the most articulate, provocative political comedians of our time. Admittedly, sometimes he’s really pushing it and your eyes widen and your jar drops and you think to yourself “I can’t believe he actually said that”,  but that’s his signature, that’s what he is all about. He wants to provoke, he wants to offend, because he’s not willing to let people get away with shit.

I am a big fan of his show “Real Time with Bill Maher” on HBO. He always has a slue of interesting guests – both from the political right and left, as well as actors, activists and other comedians – and is not afraid to ask uncomfortable questions. He tends to take everything with a grain of salt, but also doesn’t hesitate to call people on their BS.

I know, opinions are divided about him. It’s either you love him or you hate him. He doesn’t leave much room for indecision.

BUT: If you do like him (and I hope you do!) and if he’s doing a show anywhere near you, do yourself a favor and go see him. It’s absolutely worth it.

And if you don’t like him, I leave you with a somewhat provocative statement from one of the commentators on the Sacramento Press website, who stated correctly:

“The dismissiveness and dislike of Maher shows louder than words that he’s striking a nerve – and he is doing so because, uh, he’s right.”

 

 

8

On being an aunt

April 6, 2010 filed under: cracks me up, family, love, photography

Picture 116s

{Warning: This blog post contains a lot of talk about babies, dirty diapers and swooning. Just be prepared.}

My niece is just the cutest 15-month-old you can ever imagine. You probably think I am biased (and maybe you’re right, whatevs!), but Greta could steal anyone’s heart in a heartbeat. I mean, just look at her!

She’s smart and funny and she definitely knows what she wants. If she wants “Kuku” (B*ko – a German brand for cream cheese) on her breakfast roll, she wants “Kuku” and won’t have anything else.
She’s quite determined. I love how clever and quick she is for her age.
My sister tells me that within a week after I left, she had learned so many new words already. You got to be careful what you say, because she definitely understands pretty much everything that you’re saying by now. Children’s brains amaze me. They soak every bit of information up like a sponge.

Since my sister was about to have her second baby, I tried to convince her that it would be a really good idea if Greta would come and stay with me for the next two months, what with all the busyness surrounding the arrival of the new baby.
I promised I would return her in one piece in May, but Nina wanted to hear none of it. Odd, don’t you think?

I haven’t really had the baby fever yet, but being around my niece is definitely “dangerous” territory. It’s exhilarating and exhausting at the same time (I have no idea how Nina will manage with two toddlers), but it’s also the most rewarding experience anyone could have.

Living away from your family does suck on a regular basis, but if children are part of the equation, it makes things so much harder. 6 months seem to fly by for each of us like nothing, but 6 months in the life of a child include huge milestones of development.
Last time I saw Greta, she could barely walk a step on her own, this time she was able to run towards me and (away again) in seconds. It’s so amazing to see how much they learn in such short periods of time.

I wish I could have recorded (or taken pictures) of all her cute little idiosyncrasies… she would grab on to my hair on either side of my face and pull it over her head as if she was trying to hide underneath it and then she would look at me with those big, surprised eyes and say “Huuuuuh” as if she completely scared herself.

She would also state in all ways possible if she was opposed to something… she’d non-stop exclaim “nein”, “nee”, “nö” (all German variations of the word “no”) in rapid succession to get her point across. (Ok, Greta, we got it – you didn’t want that. :))

The best part was when my sister would change her diapers and Greta would pick up the dirty diaper, take a sniff, wrinkle her nose and exclaim “Baaaahhh”, before taking it to the trash can in the bathroom and place it in there, uttering “Müll” (garbage). Heheh.

She totally cracked me up.

See for yourself…

17

What’s your stand on kids running around naked?

July 16, 2009 filed under: cracks me up, I can't make this shit up

I came across this article in the New York Times this morning and I wondered: Why is nudity, even of children, such a big deal in the US?

Let’s all remember Janet Jackson’s little “wardrobe malfunction” (or whatever it was) at the 2004 Superbowl Halftime Show and the public outcry that followed, shall we? I am thinking: RIDICULOUS. Don’t have people more important things to do and talk about than a little boob flash on TV?
Federal Communications Commission Chairman Michael Powell commented following the incident “We all as a society have a responsibility as to what the images and messages our children hear when they’re likely to be watching television.”
But I seriously ask you, what harm do you think could this 9/16th of a second of breast exposure have done to a child?  I am not even sure a kid would have necessarily noticed or thought much of it, if it hadn’t been for the parents and/or media that completely freaked the *eff* out.
I honestly believe that the hype that surrounded this incident had a much bigger impact on children than the incident itself. I for one found the whole story slightly amusing and not at all “outrageous” or “a sign of decreasing morality in the national culture”. Why is nudity in public such a HUGE issue? Or was it the sexual implication that went along with the boob flash? I mean, come on. What about the suggestive moves and the very explicit lyrics? Isn’t that much worse than a little bit of extra skin?

Comparing nudity and sexuality is like comparing apples and oranges. They are two completely different things. To come full circle, I know, you might be wondering what the boob flash incident has to do with kids running around naked.
It has nothing and everything to do with it.
To kids things are only a “big deal” if adults make them a big deal.  If someone has a problem with seeing young children running around naked, it makes me think that they have a hang-up of some sort. There is nothing wrong with kids being naked and for God’s sake, please don’t make it anything sexual. It is not. Even when kids touch themselves or other kids, it’s totally natural up to a certain age (it’s called natural development)… unless adults make it out to be something else (and that’s where all the distorted sexual ideas in children and teens come from, IMHO).

In Germany, nudity is not a big issue. My parents let me run around naked at the beach, in the backyard and at home until I was maybe 4-5 years old, topless until I was maybe 10. After all, I didn’t have any breasts back then. And, at the risk of making your jaws drop, I’ve always got to see my parents naked as well. I mean, to heck with it, I still see them naked occasionally. In case you fear my family is a bunch of hippies and we all hang out naked when we get together, that is not the case :)
But when I visit home and they happen to get out of the shower in the morning – well, let’s just say they don’t wear bathing suits or shorts to shower.
Also, there is nothing “immoral” about seeing you parents naked after the age of 5 or being seen by them.
It is also very normal that women (and guys, respectively) shower in a communal shower area after working out. After all, there is nothing to see that one hasn’t seen before ;)

I know that I can only speak for myself and about how things were done in my family, but I do believe that kids that grow up accepting nudity as something natural, which you don’t have to be ashamed about, are much more relaxed and comfortable with themselves and others. And Janet Jackson’s boob flash wouldn’t raise much more than an amused eyebrow with them (as it did with most Europeans when the incident was broadcasted a day after it happened).

Most people were actually thinking “‘What’s all the fuss about over there”?

13

Comedy night: Jeff Dunham

April 20, 2009 filed under: cracks me up, fun!, my so-called life, USA

J and I had tickets for Jeff Dunham’s show “Spark of Insanity” on Thursday night. OMG! It was absolutely hilarious.
It is unbelievably hard to get tickets for his shows. They sell out pretty quickly and I got lucky last fall when I found out that his tickets would go on sale a couple of days later. I logged onto Ticketmaster at 10 a.m. sharp on that day, just to find out that all tickets for the first 20 rows were already gone. WTH?

I still got floor seat tickets which – if the show takes place in a sports arena – is pretty good. You don’t want to sit all the way up in the blocks just below the ceiling. Arco Arena is an especially steep arena which does not make a good venue for stage performances, if you ask me, but oh well.

Jeff Dunham and Achmed
Jeff Dunham and Achmed, the dead terrorist

The show itself was absolutely fantastic. Jeff Dunham is a ventriloquist and a genius. The way he argues with himself through his puppets is brilliant. I haven’t laughed that much in a long time! Do you know that feeling when you actually have to start rubbing your cheeks because the laughter is becoming too much to bear? THAT’s what it felt like.

If you don’t know Jeff Dunham, you have to check him out on youtube.com. I promise, you won’t regret it.

You know, understanding comedy in a foreign language is real hard. It’s not only about the language barrier that needs to be overcome with time, but also about “common knowledge”.
I never realized how much people are influenced and shaped by the environment they grow up in. Comedy makes use of that environment constantly and so it’s not surprising that by the time I had pretty much overcome the language barrier, I was still going “huh?” in obvious despair half of the time, because I still didn’t get the jokes. I got every single word that came out of the comedians’ mouths, but I could not for the life of me make sense of it or even find it funny.
Until I realized: it has nothing to do with language, but all to do with culture and environment.

Daily life is often the basis on which comedians built their shows and funnily enough, even if it doesn’t seem so different superficially, daily life in different countries/cultures is VERY different.
Comedians make connections or refer to people/events/situations that you might have NO idea of if you grew up somewhere else. It’s literally impossible to even catch up on all the references that are made in comedy.
I mean, for crying out loud, do you (Germans) know how many jokes had to be “changed” or completely omitted by dubbing the Simpsons? It’s virtually impossible to dub comedy.
Of course, there are generic jokes that will work in every language, but most of the best and subtle jokes will only work and be understood, if you grew up within the same culture from which the jokes originated.

With time (and J’s tireless patience to explain) I have come to understand, I would say about 90% of foreign comedy. Some of it isn’t even funny after J explained it to me, but I at least understand the connection that was made.
In return, J will never fully appreciate and understand “Loriot“- my favorite German Comedian (who will turn, oh only, 86 this year) – which makes me a tiny bit sad, but that obviously comes with the different cultural backgrounds of bi-national relationships.

On the other hand, there are a lot of good things that we “get” from having different cultural backgrounds. I guess in the end, we get the best of both worlds ;)

8

At the coffee shop

March 17, 2009 filed under: cracks me up, FYI

I went to a Starbucks last week to make my first use of Sanni’s birthday present: a personalized Starbucks Gift Card. The following situation unfolded.

Cashier-Barista welcomes me and I order a grande latte macchiato. Cashier-Barista gives me a funny look, turns to Barista#2 and asks “Have you prepared a latte macchiato before?”

(I need to mention here that the Peet’s Coffee and Tea menu is WAY MORE elaborate then the Starbucks menu. Latte macchiato was not one of the Starbucks menu options and I felt slightly bad ordering something that was not on the menu, but then again, it’s NOT that weird of an order.)

Barista #2 turns around and looks at the menu, then shakes her head.
Cashier/Barista turns to me and asks “Sorry, what exactly is a latte macchiato?”

I am about to respond “Am I working at a coffee shop or you”?, but refrain myself and respond “It’s basically the same as a café latte, just that you steam the milk first and then pour the espresso on top of the milk, rather than putting the espresso in first and filling up the cup with steamed milk”.

Barista #2’s face lightens up and she says “Oh, so it’s an upside down latte!”, excited that she obviously knows how to fix that!

Yes, if you will. I prefer to call it a “latte macchiato”, thank you very much, but I’ll take the upside-down latte.
This time only though ;)

8

At the check-out

December 11, 2008 filed under: cracks me up, my so-called life

I went to TJ’s after work to pick up some chocolate and a bottle of wine to give to my co-workers for Christmas. When I walked up to the check-out, the following conversation unfolded.

Clerk: May I see proper documentation for the legal purchase of alcohol? (Translate: ID, please!)

Me: Yes, here you go!

C: (Looks once. Looks twice.) Oh. (Pause.) You know, you should get rid off your fake ID when you turn 21 and get a real one.

Me: Thanks for the advice. I guess, I need to do that then.

C: Oh, and also, you don’t have to make yourself older than 25 on your fake ID either.

Me: Really?

I walked out giggling. It always cracks me up when that happens.
I wonder how long I can get away with it.

5

Hi, I am San – German native, dual-citizen living in beautiful Northern California. Runner. Knitter. Crafter. Reader. Writer. Proud aunt, sister, and friend.

I’ve been blogging since 2004 and don’t intend to stop any time soon. If you are looking for personal content and making a  genuine connection, you’ve come to the right place.

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