theinbetweenismine

just a girl living the expat life

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Archives for July 2015

July Favorites

July 31, 2015 filed under: monthly favorites

July2015MonthlyFavorites

1.) I ran out of honey last winter and hadn’t bought more until recently (I usually only use it in tea), but this month I have re-discovered my love for a slice of toast with honey. And Trader Joe’s organic wild collected raw honey is delicious!

2.) Caprese Salad. What can I say! My summer favorite – always.

3.) My mom brought me Prinzenrolle from home (plus some other German goodies) and I am currently obsessed. They’re so good and remind me of home.

4.) Still love, love, love my Chemex. So much that I got my whole family hooked when they were here and my sister and BIL left with a Chemex of their own.  What can I say. Good coffee is good coffee.

5.) My Mom also brought me some new knitting yarn and I can’t wait to use it.

6.) I got these Old Navy shorts on sale when I was shopping with my sister and I think they are so cute. Not to mention, comfortable! :)

4

Currently | July

July 27, 2015 filed under: currently

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still feeling a little bit lost without my family. It’s a lingering feeling that is hard to describe to people, especially when your family lives in a different country/culture. It’s so much more than the physical distance that makes your heart ache.

eating my feelings in chocolate chip ice-cream. Don’t mind if I do in 100+F weather.

listening to old audio books from my childhood. We downloaded a few for my niece and nephew to listen to in the car during our road trip and I’ve gotten nostalgic over how well I remember some of them (and wondering how many times I must have listened to them as a child to remember them so well!).

celebrating the fact that I’ve gotten my Feedly reader from 1,078 down to 275 unread posts in the last few days. I am not one to “mark all unread posts as read” and move on with my life. I, at least, glance over blog titles, and only remove the ones that I am not (currently) interested in, or the ones thatI have glanced over, read or bookmarked for later. 275 seems like a much more manageable number already.

looking forward to a low-key week and a visit at the Farmers Market again next weekend.

cheering for the Red Sox even though they have major issues this season. Sigh.

drinking homemade, ice-cold Arnold Palmer‘s. So refreshing

loving the necklace that my sister gave me.

confessing that I have a love-hate relationship with #hashtags. I find them useful to categorize photos (or add some extra information to a capture), but generally get annoyed when someone uses too many hashtags or crazy-long made-up ones. Just me?

keeping in mind that there need to be low times if you also want to experience the highs!

6

On the suckiness of goodbyes

July 23, 2015 filed under: Expat stories, real life

How lucky I am to have something
that makes saying goodbye so hard.

                                               – A. A. Milne 

On Monday morning, I dropped off my family – my parents, my sister, BIL and the munchkins – at the airport after three full weeks of blissful family summer vacation. If you follow me on Instagram, you’ve seen some pictures (and in every single one I am probably grinning like a Cheshire Cat).

What can I say? My family is awesome and I don’t ever get tired of them (not even after three weeks of hanging out 24/7). To tell you that my heart ached seeing them go is a huge understatement. It was more like it was being ripped out of my chest.

Those are the days when I want to get on the plane with them and never look back.

Of course, I didn’t do that.

Of course, I also consider myself very lucky to have family that I miss dearly when I can’t be around them. Heartache is much better than not having a loving relationship with your parents/siblings at all. I get it. I totally do!

I just tend to ‘forget’ that when tears blur my vision and all I wanna do is pull the blanket over my head and shut out the world. Saying goodbye is not getting easier, that’s for sure. In fact, it seems to have gotten harder over time.

Four weeks ago, my parents arrived with my nephew. My sister, BIL and niece came a couple of days later. I have no freaking idea how a whole month is already over again. I find it extremely unfair how slowly time seems to crawl when you’re waiting for something and how fast it speeds by when you’re having fun.

But it is what it is.

I wish there was a way you could hold on to those special moments a little longer. I appreciate them (and the memories we made) every second of every day (and I have 5000+ photos to prove it! Don’t worry, I’ll only pick out a fraction for your viewing pleasure!), but it always seems like precious times keep slipping through my fingers at a much faster rate.

I wasn’t the one traveling through time zones this time, but I feel emotionally jetlagged. I think being ‘left behind’ is almost worse than getting on a plane yourself. You have to go home to a now “empty” apartment. One minute they are there, then they are not.

I felt so lost.

My sister and I are known to bawl our eyes out at goodbyes as is, but I also kept randomly crying throughout the rest of the day. What is this uncontrollable madness?

My sister’s first message, after she got home was “I don’t know how you do this”.
Yeah, me neither. I myself often wonder how I do this.

But then I think about how much I love California and my life here and that we would have never had this fantastic vacation traveling through the Southwest together, if it hadn’t been for me living here.

I’ve realized more than once that there always is a price to pay as a consequence of your life choices and there is no real way to avoid it either. There will always be a “what if…”, no matter what you decide to do.

I often feel like I contemplate the what-ifs a little more than most people, but maybe that is not true. Maybe we just tend to not talk about it with other people that much. It’s futile anyway. But I keep thinking that everybody – in one way or another – must have similar feelings. And there is always the nagging feeling in the back of my mind how things could be different …

If you live far away from your family, how do you deal with this?

8

Guest post | Book recommendations

July 17, 2015 filed under: books, guest blog post

kristencosta-small-versionMy friend Kristen is filling in for me while I am at Yosemite National park enjoying  time with my family.

Kristen and I met many years ago online and we have a shared love for books, family, and real talk. I’ve come to appreciate her kindness and honesty which comes straight from the heart. If you are interested in some fantastic book recommendations – I already read some of her suggestions myself! – read on!

You should also check out Kristen’s blog LifeByKristen.com and you can find her on Twitter @LifeByKristenC.


Hi there! Kristen from LifeByKristen.com here! I’ve been blogging over at my site for about 3-ish years.

I am so happy to be posting while San is enjoying some quality family time. I’ve long been a reader of her blog and she is definitely one of my favorite people on the internet. I’m still sad I missed an opportunity to meet her IRL a few years ago! San graciously gave me free reign to write about something of interest to me, and as I know she is a fellow book lover, I thought writing about my favorite reading genre would be fun.

I think my interest in this genre began with the American Girl books ( Kirsten was my favorite). I’m a history nut- part of the reason I chose a career in museums is because I love learning about people, places, events, and objects from the past. I enjoy reading historical fiction for the same reasons.  As a writer myself, I can also appreciate and respect the creativity that comes with creating a new story from an actual event. In my opinion, it takes a whole other level of research and thinking to try to frame a story around a series of well-defined facts and people.

If you’re a fan of historical fiction, there are books out there that meet just about every time period or major historical event. There are even time-traveling, vampire-filled historical fiction books! For me, I’ve found I enjoy historical fiction that is character-driven, usually with a love story or some sort of drama or intrigue built into it. I tend to read a lot with female main characters, and seem to have more than my fair share with plots that center around World War II. With that in mind, here are a few of my favorites to recommend!

The Baker Towers by Jennifer Haigh—this book is easily on my top ten favorite books of all time.  I read it almost in one sitting. It follows a family in a Pennsylvania mining town from the days after World War II through the modern era. I especially enjoyed this because each part is told from a different family member perspective, another element of fiction I tend to go after. Haigh is a masterful storyteller—I’ve devoured every single one of her books and she is the first author I recommend to people looking something new. News from Heaven is a recent collection of her short stories that is a companion piece to Baker Towers.

Anne of the Wild Rose Inn by Jennifer Armstrong—a YA book that I originally read while in junior high, this is a series of novels that feature a different girl ‘of the Wild Rose Inn’ during various time periods. While I’ve read a number of them, this was my first and about the American Revolution, specifically the events in Concord and Boston, MA. I was born in Concord, so take some strange connection to the American Revolution as a historical interest. This book is classic teenage romance.

The Boston Girl by Anita Diamant- I was captivated by the main character and learned about some events and places in the Boston-area that I am familiar with, but didn’t know much about. Super enjoyable read. Also recommend The Red Tent by her- story of Old Testament of the Bible from a lesser known woman’s perspective.

The Future Homemakers of America by Laurie Graham – I can’t remember where I picked up this book, but it was one of those finds where I laughed so much when reading. It follows a group of women who are military wives, all thrown together when living on a military base in England together during World War II. It follows the gals through the years and takes in a lot of the social and cultural history of America after World War II.

Sarah’s Key by Tatiana de Rosnay- Heartbreaking, but lovely story of lesser known events involving French Jews during days leading up to the outbreak of World War II. Could barely put it down!

Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen- 1930s traveling circus with an amazing elephant. I have a soft spot for elephants, so I was destined to love this book. Do not see the movie- doesn’t even come close to doing this amazing tale justice. I’m anxious to read her new book (At the Water’s Edge) — #70 out of 189 on my library wait list for it!

Loving Frank by Nancy Horan- I bought this book when Borders closed and it sat on my bookshelf forever, but when I picked it up on a lazy summer weekend, I read it in almost one sitting. I knew a bit about Frank Lloyd Wright’s life, but this is told from the perspective of his mistress. I love when historical fiction gives me just enough information to then go out and want to learn more.

For quick, light romantic, historically based reads, I recommend Sara Jio’s books- My favorite is Goodnight June.

I could go on and on, but if you have any other recommendations, I’d love to have them!

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July Link Love

July 15, 2015 filed under: link love

JULYLinkLove

6 ways to slow down time. Yes please!

For the geography nerd in me (and you?) How well do you actually know the US states?

Roasted asparagus and mushroom carbonara. Sounds delicious!

8 simple sentences we must say…& hear. Yes, yes, yes.

Swoon. Wouldn’t that be the best piece of mail in your mailbox? How to hand-letter an envelope.

Greek Yogurt Blueberry Lemon Muffins. All my favorite things combined!

I dig those road trip tips.

This beautiful knit shawl (with pattern!).

There are two kinds of people. Ha!

11 habits you should definitely steal from ultra-productive people.

The 6 best things you can do for your body – won’t hurt for sure!

Do you use a planer? Would you like free printables?

How to applique tea towels. So cute!

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Guest post| A Story of Friendship

July 13, 2015 filed under: friends, guest blog post

stephanyreihingToday, my friend Stephany is filling in for me while I am haning out in the Bay Area with my family.

I’ve been reading Stephany’s blog for a few years now and I’ve always felt that she’s been a very authentic and genuine person. She’s not afraid to talk about uncomfortable things and share her own journey. Today she’ll share some thoughts (and wise words) on friendship.

If you want to read more from Stephany, she blogs at stephanywrites.com and you can also follow her on Twitter @stephanywrites and on Instagram @stephanywrites.


Friendship is something I’ve always struggled with. It was easier when I was a child. I made friends with people in my classes and had neighborhood friends that I would spend all my free time with. There’s something so incredible about how easy it is to make friends as a child. We’re all dying for connection, right? We all want to connect with others, even when we’re five years old and sharing a shovel with a stranger in the sandbox.

In high school, I had a core group of girlfriends. I loved those girls, but I never felt as if I could be fully myself. Once, one of the girls even told me I was boring, something that haunted me from that moment on. (I now fully embrace being boring!) When I left for college, I knew those friendships would fade in my past, and they did.

Next was college and boy, did I struggle. I tried living on campus because I wanted that normal college experience. Slumber parties and inside jokes and late night studying. But college was nothing like I expected it to be. My roommate and I didn’t get along and after a year, I moved back home and became a commuter student. I never developed those lifelong college friendships that most people seem to have. I was shy and I kept to myself. And I had other non-school obligations that didn’t allow for spending a ton of time on campus, joining clubs and hanging out.

Throughout college, my only real friend was my mom. And my mom is amazing and my best friend to this day, but there’s something totally different in having girlfriends your age. But I was too shy and too insecure in myself to reach out to others, so I didn’t form strong relationships with anyone at my school.

It’s been four years since I graduated. And in those four years, I have made it a priority to develop friendships with girls my age. I’m an introvert and I am incredibly shy, so opening myself up and trying new social groups is something that is sometimes downright impossible for me.

Beyond that, though, I knew that cultivating strong female friendships was important. It was vital to my well-being.

My first step was to join a book club. I am a voracious reader, so this made perfect sense. I found a group through Meetup.com, but it took me over a year to summon up the courage to join. (I told you I was shy!)

I went to my first book club meeting in October of 2012 and though I agonized about going and tried to talk myself out of it, I went and it was a fantastic time. Since then, I’ve been to just about every book club meeting and have made some of my closest friendships. I’ve gone on a cruise with some of the girls and started a writing group with another girl. I love these girls dearly and I can’t imagine my life without them. They are “my people.”

After my book club girls, there are my coworkers. Let me tell you how fortunate I feel to have made such wonderful friends through work. Maybe some believe that coworkers should be just that: people you work with. But oh, it is wonderful to work with some of my favorite friends. One coworker in particular has become my best friend, someone I can’t imagine my life without. Someone I’ve grown so close to that I’ve made plans to become roommates with her next month.

This is something I didn’t believe could happen for me. I didn’t believe strong female friendship was possible for me. Maybe it was because, growing up, I didn’t have friends who really supported me and loved me for who I was. Or maybe it was because college was such a lonely, dark time in my life. I wasn’t the girl people made plans with, I suppose. I was the shy, quiet, introverted girl. The one who was content to stand on the sidelines.

I mean sure, my social calendar still isn’t buzzing with events. I still don’t have a ton of friends. But I’ve never been one who has needed to have a ton of friends. I’ve always looked for quality friendships over quantity friendships. As an introvert, I get worn out from too much social interaction anyway and I need a ton of alone time to feel like myself.

My life feels so different from that lonely college girl, the one who didn’t have friends and didn’t know how to make them. I’ve invested in friendships and though they might not be the lifelong friendships so many people my age have, this is the way my story is being told. A story about a lonely girl who was too shy to invest into friendships until she found the confidence to do so. I’ve formed strong bonds with girls I love to my bones.

And though it takes some work to maintain these friendships, it’s something I do with much gratitude and gladness, because I know what it was like before and I never want to be that lonely girl ever again.

1

Guest post |Cupcakes anyone?

July 10, 2015 filed under: food, guest blog post, recipe

hollyToday my friend Holly is filling in for me while I am in Las Vegas on vacation with my family.

I’ve known Holly and have been reading her blog for a few years now and truly enjoy her stories about  family life with her husband and two kids in Edmonton,  Alberta. Holly is one of the sweetest and kindest persons that you’ll meet on the Internet and you should definitely check out her blog scattered-words.net and follow her on Twitter@scattered_words.

Holly shares an easy, tried and tested (and pre-schoolers-approved!) recipe for vanilla cupcakes. Who doesn’t like cupcakes?


First and foremost, let me say that I am no expert when it comes to baking.  I watch a couple of shows on the Food Network every now and then, and last year I was inspired to purchase a Groupon for an online cooking course (that I never completed!) – but that’s the extent of my “qualifications”  to be sharing a recipe.  The Truth:  Until May of this year, every cake and cupcake I have ever made has come out of a box.

In May, I volunteered to bring cupcakes to my son’s preschool to celebrate his birthday.  I didn’t want to look like a fool in front of the Pinterest moms so I knew I needed to up my game.

cupcakes2

After an evening of scouring the Internet, this is what I found:

https://deliciouslysprinkled.com/vanilla-cupcakes/

It looked simple enough, and I already had all of the ingredients on hand, so I decided to give it a try!

Ingredients:


Cupcakes:

1 ¼ cups all purpose flour
½ tsp baking powder
¼ tsp baking soda
¼ tsp salt
2 large eggs
1 cup granulated sugar
½ cup unsalted butter (softened)
1 ½ tsp vanilla extract
½ cup sour cream

Frosting:

1 cup unsalted butter (softened)
2 ½ cups powdered sugar
1 Tbsp vanilla extract
1 Tbsp heavy whipping cream
Sprinkles if desired

Directions:


To make the cupcakes:

Pre-heat the oven to 350ºF.  Line muffin tins with cupcake liners.  Set aside. In a medium bowl, mix flour baking powder, baking soda and salt.  Set aside.
In a large bowl, using an electric or stand mixer on medium speed, beat eggs and sugar until light and creamy (about 2 minutes).  Add the butter and vanilla extract and beat on low until well blended (about 1 minute).  Add the dry ingredients and beat on low until blended.  Don’t overmix!  (If you do your cupcakes will not be light and fluffy.  Trust me, I’ve done it!)   Add the sour cream and beat until smooth.

Fill each cupcake liner about ¾ of the way full with cupcake batter.  The original recipe states that it will make 12 cupcakes but I usually make 18 slightly smaller cupcakes.  My kids really don’t need any extra sugar!  Bake approximately 18 minutes, or until toothpick inserted in centre comes out clean. Allow cupcakes to cool before frosting.

To make the frosting:

Mix softened butter on medium speed with an electric or stand mixer for 30 seconds or until smooth and creamy. Add powdered sugar, heavy whipping cream and vanilla extract.  Increase to high speed and beat for 3 minutes.  Add more cream if needed for spreading consistency. Frost and decorate!


They were so amazing that four kids actually cried because I only brought enough for everyone to have one.  Okay, so I’m sure some kids would probably cry just because it was a cupcake, never mind how fantastic it was, but still.  I consider that a rave review!

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A few of my favorite (more) natural skin and hair care products

July 8, 2015 filed under: beauty, lists!, love

beautyfavorites_20150413

 

In an attempt to move to more natural skincare products, I’ve tried a few things and thought I’d share some (mostly, but not all drugstore) products that I really like right now.

1. Physician’s Formula Organic Wear® 100 % Natural Origin Fakeout™ Mascara I bought this because I had a coupon and since I had tried other Organic Wear products before and I am pretty happy with this. It’s not my holy grail of mascara, but I like it well enough and it’s has a good safety rating by the Environmental Working Group organization. (EWG’s Skin Deep rating: 1)

2. Primal Pit Paste – Ok, this natural deodorant has been a true life changer (at least for me). I’ve been using it for about 9 months now and I love it. I’ve tried the “unscented”  and the “ thyme lemongrass” options and while I like the lemon-y scent of the latter, I think I’d next time go with the unscented one again, because it truly never made me smelly.

I had no problem with the fact that you apply this with your fingers, since it comes in a little pot. I think there are also sticks available, but I haven’t personally tried them out and I don’t mind the pot. (EWG’s Skin Deep rating: 0)

3. Neutrogena Naturals Purifying Facial Cleanser I’ve been using this cleanser for a few months now and what I like about it is that it doesn’t dry out my face, while doing a really good job getting rid of makeup and dirt at the end of the day. Plus, it has a pleasant smell. (EWG’s Skin Deep rating: 3)

4. Lemon Tea Tree Shampoo for Oily Hair I’ve talked about this shampoo in one of my monthly favorites posts a few months ago and I still feel the same way about it. It smells lovely (like anything lemon-y) and tackles the oily roots of my fine hair without drying out the rest of my hair. (EWG’s Skin Deep rating: 3)

5. Burt’s Bees lip shimmer I might have mentioned this one before as well. I am not big into lip colors and balms, but this one treats chapped lips and applies a bit of color at the same time. You can’t go wrong with that. (EWG’s Skin Deep rating: 2)

6. Andalou Naturals Hyaluronic DMAE Lift & Firm Cream  I came across this natural skin care line while shopping at our local Co-op and since they had a sale going on at the time, I thought I’d give this brand a try… and I am so glad that I did. The Andalou Naturals products are all vegan and free of GMO’s, Petrochemicals, Phthalates, Sulfates, and other harmful ingredients. This moisturizer feels a bit like ‘whipped cream’, it’s very light and applies well and is absorbed quickly. It doesn’t leave you with a sticky feeling, but just soft, smooth skin. (EWG’s Skin Deep rating: 2)

7. Physician’s Formula Organic Wear CC Cream – I am a big fan of BB or CC creams. I don’t like to slather thick make-up on my skin on a regular basis, but BB/CC creams provide SPF, medium coverage and still feel pretty light. This one is from the organic wear line from Physician’s formula and I think it’s pretty good for the price-point. It’s a little thicker than I would like it to be, but once it’s applied, it feels pretty light and covers well.  (Couldn’t find this specific item, but most Physician’s Formula Organic Wear items have a EWG’s Skin Deep rating between 1-3).

1

Guest post | Locate: Home

July 6, 2015 filed under: family, guest blog post

Today, my friend Marie is filling in for me while I am away hanging out with my family at the Grand Canyon.

I don’t exactly remember how I met Marie in the endless realms of the Internet, but it’s more important that I did indeed find her.
I feel like she and I, we’re a lot alike – personality-wise, but also when it comes to our living circumstances. We both deal with the joys and pitfalls of being expats in a foreign country; one of the pitfalls being that we’ll always miss our families just a little bit too much. Marie explores what “home” means to her in her post today and I can relate so much.

If you’d like to get to know her a little more (and you definitely should!), Marie blogs at mariescafe.com and shares her photos on Instagram @_grabacup_.

Blog story photo_marie

I always thought the phrase “home is where the heart is” was such a cheesy cliche. But in a way it’s true. Home is where you feel the most loved, safe, and take the most comfort.

For me, that has always been my parents until I met and later married Matt. Let me start with my parents. We moved around a lot as I was growing up (not a military brat), from country to country, different cities, and sometimes just different houses within the same city. Wherever my parents went, I went (of course) and so I have always associated home to be them. Home for me is not a physical location.

In 2002, I left my “home” to come to the U.S. to study for my master’s and I knew that I would never be going back to where my parents are and currently reside (Lebanon, the country, where we are originally from). I was ok with that for a little while, but the older you get, the more you realize that the most important things in life are the people you love. Which leads to wanting to spend more time with them.

While my parents never stopped being home to me, my home grew a little bigger with Matt. I found comfort in that, especially since I could only see my parents infrequently due to the immense physical distance between us.

It’s still difficult, though, and I find myself wanting to be around my parents the older we all get. Life is so very precious and every passing moment is gone right before our very eyes. We can’t get those moments back.

I miss them terribly and I’m only ever able to see them about two weeks or so out of the year, unless they are able to visit (which isn’t always the case).

I worry about them, about who will take care of them as they grow older, and about their safety in a country that has always been in political turmoil.

The age of technology and the internet has allowed us to connect easily, but it doesn’t replace face to face contact. Holidays are missed, quick visits are impossible, even something as simple as sharing a meal is difficult.

Still, I’m grateful for all I have and for Matt. And for all the friends I have made here. Life is made infinitely better with them around.

If only someone could create teleportation technology and allow for instant travel. I’d be the first in line to try it out.

Beam me up Scotty.

2

Why YNAB

July 2, 2015 filed under: making things better, review

CaptureSo, as I mentioned a couple of weeks ago, I wanted to talk about YNAB – You Need A Budget  – a nifty little budgeting software. A friend had mentioned it on Twitter a little while back and initially I was only mildly interested and thought “yeah, maybe I’ll check it out – maybe not”.

I was already using mint.com and while I was somewhat diligent about tracking what we were spending, I never seriously considered a budget.

I KNOW. Hello adulthood, right?

Now, I wanna preface this confession with the simple fact that I was raised responsibly and taught to live within my means and to save. I never borrowed money from friends or bought anything that I didn’t have enough money saved up for. If I didn’t have the money, I couldn’t buy it. Simple as that. Credit cards are not a “concept” for managing your finances in Germany.

Yes, credit card exist, but not to the extent that they’re available to anyone here in the US. And nobody really relies on credit cards for everyday expenses or (unnecessary) purchases you cannot really afford.

There are only a few things we buy as hire-purchases: houses and cars (because most people can’t buy those outright). Everything else is pretty much paid for on the day of purchase (or at the very latest at the end of the month).

I am not saying that Germans don’t accumulate any debt. It happens. But ‘living beyond one’s means’ is neither encouraged, nor something everyone just accepts as a necessary evil.

I do realize that not having to pay horrendous college tuition when you start out as a young person probably helps with the mindset.

use money that you have and save money where you can

All I wanted to say with this is: my (subconscious) ‘budget’ has always been to only use money that I have and save money where I can (in a non-obsessive way).

The transition from being a teenager/young adult with just “spending money”, but no real financial responsibilities to a working adult with an apartment and bills to pay was a learning curve, but nothing I felt I couldn’t handle.

Still, I never really made a budget. Not because I didn’t want to, but because I felt I didn’t need to. I didn’t allocate funds for certain expenditures. I considered everything ‘savings’ unless I had to pay a bill from it or decided to buy something (that I deemed necessary). Since I knew I always had more in my account than what I consciously needed, I didn’t feel the need to actively budget. But maybe this is actually what budgeting is, just not in the sense that I would say “I have $50 for clothing this month and that’s it. I can’t spend more than that”.

In a way, it was nice because I didn’t feel I had to limit myself (although if I am honest, the way I was raised to handle money subconsciously influenced my decision-making on what were worthwhile purchases to begin with. Not feeling limited is easy if you naturally limit your spending and are not constantly fighting the urge to consume.)

I understand that other people struggle more with their spending or were forced to deal with student loan debts that they had no way to avoid.

If you’re that person, YNAB is definitely for you. The software is designed to help you manage your finances, pay off your debt and budget for your everyday expenses and towards a rainy day fund and long-term savings. But in my review, I also wanna make the case that YNAB is for you if you don’t have any debt, already have a working budget and good handle on your finances and are not living paycheck to paycheck.

know where your hard-earned money goes

It’s extremely rewarding to not only know where your (hard-earned!) money goes, but knowing that you have planned for every single dollar.

I’ve been using YNAB for only a couple of months now, but I was pretty much sold on the approach instantly.

The process is fairly simple. I am not going to explain how to set up and use the software (the process is pretty straight-forward with plenty of help along the way).

But the ground-breaking difference to other spending softwares is that with YNAB you’re not just tracking your spending (in retrospect), but you’re looking ahead and keep an eye on the money that is available in each spending category for the month.

stop spending according to your bank account balance

You will stop spending according to your bank account balance, but instead live by the “available budget” for each expense category in YNAB. The software does the math for you – you put in your spending and it always tells you how much more money is available for each category for the rest of the month.

Since you budgeted all your recurring bills, rent, and other necessary upcoming expenses in advance (when there is money available to budget), you won’t (or shouldn’t) be able to see that money as “available”  to spend on something else.

YNAB’s four rules

YNAB has four rules to live budget by.

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That simply means: no dollar just “hangs out”. You either budget it towards your expenses or decide to put it into savings, but nothing is left “unbudgeted”. If you have all your fixed expenses budgeted for, the leftover money can help to “cushion” your expense categories to ‘have a little extra’ just in case, go into your emergency fund or towards “fun money”, but you have to assign it a ‘job’.

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This second rule helps you budget in advance for less-frequent, but recurring expenses (like the annual car registration, quarterly insurance premiums, Christmas (!) etc.) and also helps to stash away some funds for expected, but less predictable expenses (like car or home repairs, vet bills, etc.) By putting a little bit of money in these categories every month (you can for example figure out to the dollar how much you need to put away if your insurance premium is going to be $300 in six months), your “rainy day fund” will grow and you’ll have peace of mind that you’ll have the money in your account when the bill comes due. No “shit-I-forgot-about-this-bill”-surprises anymore!

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A budget is not rigid. It not only will, but needs to be adjusted every month. The goal of budgeting is not to be able to anticipate your spending down to the penny and stick to the same budget amounts every month. It’s simply not feasible. Life is not predictable like that and every month will be a little bit different.

The goal is to ‘roll with the punches’ and adjust and tweak your budget every month accordingly. Overspent in one category? Make adjustments (e.g. take away some dollars from another category to cover the extra-costs). If you can’t or choose not to, the software will automatically deduct the overspent amount from next month’s money and you’ll just have to tighten your budget next month. On the flipside: if you don’t use the budgeted amount in a category, it will roll over to next month, too and you’ll have a little extra money as a buffer. Not every month will be the same, but you can strive to balance out between the months. It all comes down to try really hard to just spend what you have!

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This last rule is really geared towards people who currently live paycheck to paycheck and struggle every single month to pay their bills, because they’ll be covering those bills with money that don’t yet have in their possession. The goal here is to save up enough money (roughly the equivalent to what your regular monthly income is) and then live off that money the following month. If you manage to get there, you’ll always be “one month ahead” and there is no guessing game of how much money you have to work with in each given month, because the money is already in your bank account.

So, even though I don’t have any debt to pay off  and savings that I can dip into if need be, this way of thinking about your budget and how to manage your money (as in, your monthly income) makes a lot of sense to me.

the software also comes with an app

Tracking expenses is not something I overly enjoy, but I also don’t mind it and the software also comes with an app that makes tracking “on the go” really easy. It’s really just a matter of getting into the habit. I don’t even think twice about it anymore and J even casually reminds me when we spend money to write it down. (← Yes, get your spouse or significant other on board!)

The software itself – a download, not web-based – has an eye-pleasing, easy-to-use interface and it definitely speaks to my nerdy side. What can I say,  I just like to crunch numbers and see things neat and organized.

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© ynab.com (not my financial situation – ha!)

You can customize pretty much any aspect of this software to your liking. You can create new categories, organize them in different ways (by pay cycle, importance, alphabetically…) and delete categories you don’t need.

You budget money in the “budgeted” column, the software keeps track of your spending in the “outflows” column and the most important column for you is the “balance” column, because this is where you’ll check how much money is available for spending. (Conveniently, you can check this in the app while you’re out and about and before making any purchases. Talk about holding yourself accountable!)

The software does not connect to your online accounts (which is not a big deal for me), but you can either download your bank statement and import it into YNAB or post transactions manually (which is what I do, because I do track spending on a daily basis anyway. I just reconcile my account at the end of each month to make sure I didn’t miss anything.) I find this interactive part highly valuable in the budgeting process, because you’re forced to log and look at every individual expense.

Bottom line: This system really works, if you’re willing to put in a little bit of time upfront (and if you’re only half as nerdy as I am, you’ll have fun in the process, too!).

Phew, this got waaay longer than anticipated.
Do you have any more questions I can answer?

 


I have not been compensated by anyone for this review. The opinion is solely my own.
If you feel like this software could be for you, download the fully functioning trial version and give it a shot! If you like it, you can use this link: https://ynab.refr.cc/Q7D6NSR to activate the software after the trial period with a 10% discount.

5

Hi, I am San – German native, dual-citizen living in beautiful Northern California. Runner. Knitter. Crafter. Reader. Writer. Proud aunt, sister, and friend.

I’ve been blogging since 2004 and don’t intend to stop any time soon. If you are looking for personal content and making a  genuine connection, you’ve come to the right place.

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