Sometimes it’s not easy to find any words that properly convey a thought.
Steven Pinker

I went to see Thomas [my ex-boyfriend] and his wife yesterday. I had wanted to go and visit them at their new place for quite a while, but we never managed to find a date [how pathetic is that! after all the time I’ve been here]. Well, at least we agreed on a date last week :) We had a nice time together. I am glad we got the chance to see each other and say good bye.

My whole family came by last night for a farewell dinner. It was kind of weird, because we all had lumps in our throats. We tried to be cheerful and enjoy the time, but I know that everyone was thinking about the fact that I’ll be leaving in three days. Man, three days! I have a hard time wrapping my mind around that. It feels so surreal. I know I am repeating myself. However, I think it’s just because I can’t really put in words what’s going on inside my head right now. Don’t you know this feeling when are at the proverbial “loss of words”? This is a very interesting linguistic phenomenon.

This brings me to recommending a very interesting [and yes, geeky!] book to you. “The language Instinct – How a mind creates language” by Steven Pinker.

The idea that thought is the same thing as language is an example of what can be called a conventional absurdity: a statement that goes against all common sense but that everyone believes because they dimly recall having heard it somewhere and because it’s so pregnant with implications. […] Think about it. We have all had the experience of uttering or writing a sentence, then stopping and realizing that it wasn’t exactly what we meant to say. To have that feeling, there has to be a “what we meant to say” that is different from what we said.

One thing I definitely want to say, and which is also what I mean to say, is THANK YOU to all of you. I am constantly amazed by all the support and nice words that I get from you. It really means a lot to me.

  1. All I can say is that I am so happy for you. This has taken so damn long and you deserve to finally be with your husband.

    I can’t wait for you to be over here and although you will be a couple of hours away from me I hope we can chat once in a while.

    Take care,

  2. I can imagine how torn you must feel inside. It must be hard having to choose. But thankfully there is such things as internet, phone and planes, so you are not leaving forever.

  3. I can only imagine what you must be going through!

    I read that Pinker book for an Education class in undergrad!

  4. Have a g ood flight, honey, I hope you will be having a good start in LA with your hubby!
    A big hug! Silke

  5. 2 more days…time just flies! I wish you a lot of strength the upcoming days, but as someone said before there a lot of means of communication and you won’t be leaving forever. Sending you a big hug!

  6. Hey sugar doll!
    Unbelievable how fast time flew by… 2 more days now. Wow!!! I’m sure Jon is all antsy and can’t sleep because you’ll be there in less than 3 days. ;-)

    It’s great that you got to see the whole family one more time. Imagining how that must feel makes my throat go tight, too, though. Sad :-(. Well, they’re not out of this world! *puts on semi-cheery smile*
    Big big big hug and good luck closing those suitcases! ;-)

  7. I can’t belive you’re already leaving. I feels just like yesterday you made your countdown.

  8. 2 days. 2 days??!?!! WOW. Enjoy your time with your family. Wishing you lots of peace for the next little while.

  9. Im SO excited for you!!
    Im sure you cant wait to finally hold your hubby in your arms!! 2 more days!! Time flies, doesnt it? :-)


  10. ich wünsch dir alles erdenklich gute und freu mich sehr für dich!

  11. Look ahead. :) Look ahead. :))))

  12. sweety, i’m back to check on you and just teared up reading this post. we’ve been through all of this together for the last almost three years and it’s hard to believe all of what we’ve waited for for so long is now actually happening to both of us at the same time. just the other way around… i know i will get to where you’re at right now some time in the future as well so i think i may understand your feelings just a little bit. but also, it’s gonna be okay and those mixed feelings are SO TOTALLY normal and okay. i wish i was there to say goodbye but we’ll talk soon and i will see you in LA next spring! big smooch and i’m here any time (but you know that!) :)

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