You guys, I am on a journey.
The journey to learn how to fiercely love myself.
Wow, that sounds like a selfish endeavor, does it not?
But hear me out.
I am no stranger to the concept of love. I love deeply, I love fiercely, I love with all I have and practice loyalty to a fault, and I have relationships – romantic and platonic – to show for it. Some of which would have failed, no doubt, if I hadn’t loved so fiercely and relentlessly, eager to make it work. People know I am a giver. I give and give and give until there is nothing left to give.
But when it comes to giving a bit of this love to myself, I fail big time. This whole “self-love idea” is a strange concept to me, really. I am not sure what conditioned me to think that way, but other people and their feelings have always – sometimes consciously, but mostly unconsciously – taken precedence over mine. It’s not that I think one shouldn’t love oneself, in fact, I absolutely think one should, but the theoretical idea of it and putting it into practice by tending to your own needs and yes, sometimes putting yourself first is a hard one for me to grasp. I am a pro in talking others into taking care of themselves (and talking them into letting me help with that) and putting themselves first, but when it comes to practicing this same self care on myself, for one strange reason or another, I feel selfish. It doesn’t mean that I won’t do things for myself sometimes, but when there is something or someone else to tend to, I will always take care of their needs first. And there I am, putting myself on the backseat again. It’s a very familiar pattern.
For a few months, I’ve been reading Stratejoy and have been enjoying the inspiration and encouragement of blog posts and newsletters written by Molly and her team of guest bloggers. I’ve found the content to be quite worthwhile. I’d even go so far as to say that I would nod along while reading, because most, if not all of the thoughts that were shared around the topics of self-love and self-care seemed very logical to me. Of course, we have to take care of ourselves first, before we can take care of others. Of course, I think that I deserve as much attention as everybody else around me. You know, theoretically. But that was the extent of it. It never went any further than theoretical agreement. Then, a few weeks ago, I stumbled upon the Fierce Love Course. This course would actually mean to not just read along, but to put the concept into action.
some a very short time of consideration, I decided that is was time – and totally worth it – to invest in myself, that maybe it wasn’t so selfish after all to learn how to take care of myself; and so I signed up for the 30-day course.
I am currently in week 2 and I am planning to share some bits and pieces of my journey with you. I also feel very lucky to do this course with a bunch of awesome ladies, first and foremost my Fierce Love buddy Erin, who agreed to work with me on this and keep me motivated (and vice versa, of course).
What is one thing you have done for yourself today?