More BiSC talk… because friends and VEGAS and I want to be a VIP again.


So, it’s been a whole month since BiSC and it seems like I’ve been a bit at a loss of words lately which really just means that I am still slightly emotionally hungover from all the awesomeness. Does anyone have a good remedy (besides going back to Vegas and just doing it all over again?) No?

Fine then.

One thing BiSC has made blatantly clear to me is my lack of local friends. People to hang out with and do stuff with, people to make memories with on a regular basis, a group of (girl)friends that I am comfortable around. It’s hard to come by and BiSC made it seemed so incredibly easy, but also: possible.

You know, one of the many things I gave up when I moved to the US was a solid group of friends, some of which I had known since elementary school. You always think that you’ll never lose touch with people… until you do. And let me tell you, you can think you know someone inside and out, but at the end of the day you still have no freakin’ clue if this friendship will survive your moving halfway across the world. Not everybody is a good email and Skype friend. SURPRISE! I learned pretty quickly which friends are and which are not capable of doing the “long distance friendship thing”.

The cool thing with my Internet friends (and selected IRL friends) is: I already KNOW that they can handle the long distance thing, because they do it on a daily basis and then they also make the effort to make face time happen whenever possible.

Doni brought up the topic of MBTI personality types on Facebook and how fascinating it is how many introverts roams the Internets. I mentioned before that I – repeatedly – turn out to be an INFJ (Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging). Apparently, that’s the rarest personality type of all (only 1% of the population is INFJ), and yet, many of my fellow BiSC-uits are INFJs! Hooray.
Here’s something that I found quite fitting for all us INFJ BiSC-uits.

“INFJs are masters of written communication, with a distinctively smooth and warm language. In addition, the sensitivity of INFJs allows them to connect to others quite easily. Their easy and pleasant communication can often mislead bystanders, who might think that the INFJ is actually an extrovert. (from 16 personalities).

Even though I am still not quite sure how I gathered all my courage to go to Vegas to meet up with 60+ ‘strangers’ IRL and while I am definitely not an extrovert (because it was incredibly hard to be ‘on’ for four days straight),  I realized that yes, even as an introvert, I crave social interaction. Even as an introvert who coincidentally also tends to be shy (which, by the way, is NOT the same thing), I blossom around the right people. And people, who know me well and around whom I feel comfortable, know that I can talk a lot and be loud and fun, if they let me.

I am usually someone who in regards to friendship is a quality > quantity kind-of-person, and I stand by that. Still, a little bit to my surprise (but if I really think about it, not so surprisingly), many people have in the past commented on the fact that I have “so many friends” or know “so many people”. My first instinct was to deny that, but I guess it’s true: you do meet a lot of people through the Internet and blogs.

I’d like to think that I am able to maintain each and every one of my friendships in its own kind of way, because I believe every single relationship is unique and special. Of course, I also have my core group of friends (mostly, but not exclusively, people back home) that know most of my stuff and then some, but I’ve hinted at the fact that I just wish I could be friends with everyone. There are way too many awesome people in this world and I can literally not think of a single one of my fellow BiSC-uits that I wouldn’t have wanted to spend more time with. Sure, I probably have more in common with some people than with others, but the amazing thing  of BiSC was that deep down inside I was convinced knew that I would have had a fantastic time with every single person.

 I guess this is all just to say: I MISS YOU.

I miss eight-second-hugging you during the Mixer.

I miss smiling at each other across the room.

I miss late night talks about fun and serious stuff.

I miss poolside dancing and sunbathing.

I miss buffets and dinner conversations.

I miss ooh-ing and aah-ing over the Cirque du Soleil artists.

I miss dressing up for the ugly fashion show.

I miss cupcake sampling at dinner.

I miss happy hours and white dresses.

I miss being mistaken for a wedding party.

I miss skipping the line with you to get into the PURE Night Club.

I miss having blisters from walking the strip.

I miss late night talks and pizza.

I miss ugly crying at Sunday brunch.

I miss margaritas and nachos.

I miss hugging everyone goodbye.

I miss it all, you guys.

  1. Sending you a big hug. I felt like that after the first Vegas, after my trip to Indy to meet other blog friends, and then every time after that when I meet blog friends in big groups and in small. It’s an amazing community.

  2. I am glad you had such a great time in Vegas but I can see how it is hard to come off that weekend and adjust to a life that includes less of those intense, wonderful connections. I struggle with that in Charlotte as I have not made many friends. But I have made one very very good friend who I actually think might be my guardian angel as she has really been THAT nice. But it’s tough to not have this expansive network, especially now that I am navigating this break-up. 99% of the people I encounter are not going to be comfortable if I start crying in front of them, which there is a 50/50 chance of happening at any given moment… so yah. I get it, to some extent, as I walked away from a life full of close connections… But luckily, there are people who do long distance friendships and will skype or email or send you cards.

    Speaking of which, we need to skype one of these days!

  3. You are SO INFJ!! It’s nice knowing there are people who understand what it’s like to be me! <3 I know it's hard to put yourself out there but I know you will find that circle of friends you are longing for. You are awesome and people like you. Just be you and you will cultivate positive connections! Happy friending!!

  4. “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” I rarely take quotes wholesale, but that one really works for this.

    Of course we all miss being in the midst of the awesomeness that is BiSC, but I for one am mostly just glad to know that I have the capability to care about people that much. It’s really something special.

    And knowing we have the ability to feel such feels? Well, that’s proof that life is pretty dang worth the effort, don’t you think?

  5. i miss it all too!
    and you!
    so much!

  6. I understand what you mean here. I didn’t move across the country but I moved across the city and I had kids. My friends on this end of the city don’t have kids and my friends with kids live on the other side of the city. And a lot of my previously awesome friendships have floundered because of that.

  7. I know a lot of people too, but it’s hard for me to say oh, I’ve got a lot of friends… I think much of it is an inability or unwillingness to appear vulnerable to many. :/

  8. aw friend i miss all of this and miss you too! xoxo

  9. Awwww! Happy you had so much fun but sad that you miss your friends! Have you tried some local meet-up groups?

  10. I love this post! I miss it too…specifically I miss you!

  11. I realized the same thing my first year with friends not being local. I had friends there but I actually realized they weren’t truly my friends… anyways – I miss seeing you every day. I miss taking our double chin photos. I miss you. I promise I am usually a better long distance friend than I have been. we must skype soon! let’s set a date asap.


    Also, I can’t even begin to explain how glad I am that you went this year. I’m so glad I FINALLY got to meet you in person and that you loved this event as much, if not more, than I had hoped that you would.

    Cheers to future adventures & meetups!

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