Gay or straight – why does it matter?

Ok, I really don’t know if that is a topic that you want to talk about, but I promise, even your opinion differs from mine, I still love you.
Has anybody watched the Rachel Maddow Show last night? Specifically the part where Rachel interviewed Richard Cohen, the author of the book “Coming out straight”? He claims that ‘being homosexual’ is a choice and that everybody who doesn’t want to be gay, can turn their life around and become straight.

I think this statement is ridiculous. To discuss something like this with Rachel, who is openly gay, suggesting that  she “doesn’t have to be gay, if she doesn’t want to be” is ridiculous. Usually I wouldn’t even take a guy like this seriously.

It has to be taken seriously though, if you heard that his book and beliefs are used by a proponent of a proposed law in Uganda that debates the death penalty for homosexuals. I mean, are you freakin’ kidding me? The death penalty for being homosexual? That is pretty much the insanest thing I’ve ever heard – but you know, a lot of things exist in this world that I find insane and nobody cares. I wonder why.

Ok, so I might believe that you can talk someone into leading a “heterosexual” life, but I don’t think that you can be converted from homosexual to heterosexual or vice versa.

I know this is a touchy subject; I don’t even know my exact standpoint on the issues, because for me there are a lot of “open questions”. However, I do believe that people are born homosexual. I don’t believe that any psychological factors or your upbringing determine your inner sexuality. Obviously, it’s not purely hereditary, because otherwise how could someone with straight parents turn out to be gay? Right?  However, I think that there genetic factors that contribute. Call it a “freak of nature”. There is homosexuality in the animal world. How does that respond to psychological factors being the cause? But then again, it’s beyond belief what some people think about the causes of homosexuality.

My personal opinion is that a) nobody “decides” consciously to be homosexual, b) it is just “who you are” and c) that there is nothing to be done to change your sexual orientation (though I don’t argue that there are a lot of in between stages along a continuum between homosexuality and heterosexuality that can vary over time).

Just out of curiosity, where do you stand on this?

  1. My half brother is 16 years younger then me. I knew when he was a little boy that he is gay. Same with my best girlfriends son. We met when her oldest was 3 years old. She was the one, that addressed it when he was 5 years old, that she thought he was gay. She tried everything to “raise” him heterosexual. Just do boy stuff. But there was a difference in behavior between him and his younger brother. I have and uncle and and aunt who are gay. I could care less. I want everyone to be happy and at PEACE with who they are. This subject really gets me going. Because I feel this is really still a huge issue here in this country. Particular in the south. Yes, I am for gay marriage and for them to have the right to adopt children. Gays and lesbians are not contagious. But a hateful mind/heart is! I have raised my children to have an open mind and if they would be gay or lesbian it would be no problem for me. I also believe, if I do not walk in the shoes, I can not judge!

  2. I totally agree with you on everything! I don’t think that you have the choice. Why would somebody decide to be gay or straight? that doesn’t make any sense at all. I think you are born that way and it is absolutely crazy to say that you can just say: “Hey, I’m gonna be straight tomorrow”.
    .-= Tinka´s last blog ..meet my dog! =-.

  3. Now I am not a Rosie O’Donnell fan, but one time I heard her in an interview and she said that you just are who you are. She then said, “Why would anyone chose to be gay?” she spoke of the heartache and the prejudice and hatefulness out these aimed right at gay people.
    These words made me think.
    I have several gay friends. Several are couples that have been together for many years. I feel at times that I am less judged by them then I am by the “straight” people in my life.
    I’ve heard of this guy and I think his book is crap!
    .-= Maribeth´s last blog ..Happy Birthday Arnie & Anneliese! =-.

  4. I don’t think too much into this subject because everyone is human and that’s all that matters. I don’t care if people are black or white, straight or gay, vegan or vegetarian, punks or rockstars… My sister-in-law is vegan, bisexual AND a punk. Even though I don’t agree with some of her choices in life (regarding jobs and life security which has nothing to do with who she is), I still respect her and treat her like one of my best friends.
    .-= Stefanie´s last blog ..I should have seen it coming. =-.

  5. It’s rediculous! If I like somebody, I like somebody and I don’t care what sexuality this person prefer! I think your sexuality interest is something you’re born with. Who are we to judge about it?
    The law proposal in Uganda is sick …. no words for this ;(
    .-= Tanja´s last blog ..Angel Tree =-.

  6. I am in total agreeance with you. No one decides these things. I never looked at myself in the mirror and “decided” to be straight. That’s just who I’ve always been. I will never understand why this whole concept of sexuality is such a big deal anyway. Who cares who someone loves?

  7. Being gay is certainly not a choice! It still surprises me when people come out with these ludicrous thoughts and I find myself having to explain things to them….
    .-= ToBeAnnounced´s last blog ..Today, we discuss Tree Toppers =-.

  8. oh i could not agree more! it is just ridiculous what some people come up with. I was watching bruno the other day and he went to a gay converter. can you believe they have jobs like that? what is wrong with people? anyway i love ya!

  9. I also don’t you think you can choose your sexuality. I know I didn’t make a choice in being straight and, based on that experience, I don’t think any of my gay friends made the decision to be gay. I also don’t think people are 100% gay or straight. There’s a lot of flex involved with sexuality, I think.
    .-= Terra´s last blog ..The Great Un-Friending of 2009, or how Facebook has changed everything =-.

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