I miss Sacramento

It’s been exactly 7 months since I left Sacramento. I had a hard time leaving and I knew I would miss it. In the last few months, I’ve thought of Sacramento often. This is where I had my first “real” home with J. Although I loved living in Davis and J. and I shared our first own place with a roommate there, Sacramento is where I felt “home”. I’ve been thinking quite a bit about what it will be like when I finally return to the US to start my married life with J. Funnily enough, I always think about returning to Sacramento. You can call it nostalgia or stupidity… it is where I want to be right now. I’ve caught myself yesterday thinking about going shopping at Trader Joe’s, driving down Folsom Blvd. and stopping at the supermarket right around the corner from our [old] apartment. I thought about getting my coffee ready in the morning to go to work, walking up the stairs to my office and going out for lunch with my co-workers.
I thought about the little crêpe-place that J. and I liked to go to and about all the walking that we’ve done in the neighborhood. I miss Sacramento. I really do. It hurts to realize that I won’t go back there when I finally get on the plane.
I really am quite excited about moving to L.A though. I do believe it’s going to be a fantastic experience and I am sure that I’ll love it once I am settled in. I am looking forward to living in our beautiful apartment. I can’t wait to go shopping for accessories and then make it our home and start our life together.
But for right now, I feel nostalgic for Sacramento.

And I miss J.

I know, I don’t talk about it very often, but of course I do miss him. It’s just not fair that newlyweds have to be separated like this. Of our 8 months of marriage, we spent maybe 7 weeks together so far. This is just ridiculous. When you think about it, first and foremost we got married, so that we won’t have to be separated anymore. Well, of course we love each other and we knew that we wanted to be together and all that, but the reason to get married at this point in our relationship was clearly that we didn’t want to have a LDR again and that there was no other way for us to live together in the same country.
Well, it hasn’t exactly worked out yet. J. is going insane over there in L.A. and I don’t feel particularly better about being stuck here. The worst part of it is that it feels like our whole life is “on hold”. Sure, I absolutely enjoy the time that I get to spend with my family and friends, no doubt about that, but still … our life has to start moving forward eventually… soon!

I talked to Kim last night and as we were both whining about our LDR situations, we thought that whining together would really be so much better than each of us sitting at home alone…so we had this crazy idea that I could just hop on a train on Friday to go and see her. A problem shared is a problem halved ;) [and two problems shared are two problems quartered? *lol*]
So I looked up the train connections to Bremen last night and -what a surprise!- found an affordable connection… so I hit “Enter” and booked. Yeah, I did it :) Still having my Bahncard, plus getting the discount they have on certain connections, I really couldn’t pass up this incredible deal!

I think we’ll both have fun drowning in each other’s tears while watching all seasons of “Friends” and drinking nice big mugs of hot café latte :)

Spontaneous decisions are the best. I should decide spontaneously more often :)

  1. hun, this post just made me tear up. like i told you last night, i feel stupid for whining to you about how miserable i feel all the time when of course you’re having a tough time yourself being away from J with your life on hold. coming here to whine together was the best idea in a long time. i hope that “problems quartered thing” is true and i sure can’t wait to have you here for the weekend with lots of chatting, whining, watching DVDs and anything else we feel like doing :-)

    big *smooch*

  2. There you go you two! Two problems shared ARE two problems quartered – thats the right point! Have fun!!

    Much love,

  3. Oh yay, have lots of fun with Kim in Bremen!! Awesome!
    It really is sad that you aren’t going back to Sacramento. :-( Who knows, maybe once you are done with LA you can go back there and take G’s position. Hehe! Have you heard anything about his son, BTW?
    I’m crossing my fingers really hard for you and Kim that the LDR part is over really soon!!!
    Can’t j find a good deal on a ticket to see you for a bit like you got for the trainride? ;-)

    Big hug Sugardoll!

  4. Oh sweety, it’s so hard to be seperated from your love! What a great idea to go up to Bremen and quarter the problems. It’s making me so sad and almost physically hurts me to read your and Kims posts. It’s just not fair! I keep my fingers crossed that both of your situation comes to an end soon! *hugs*

  5. that’s true – J should come and visit – that way he can take some stuff back for you already. no chance for that???

  6. Almost forgot, your new very own homepage turned out really beautiful!

  7. THANK YOU, antje… for the nice words and that you like my website :)

  8. @ sanna: haha, that gave me a nice chuckle… G’s son is doing ok… he’ll be still on medication for the chemo maintenance… but he’s doing alright! thanks for keeping your fingers crossed!

  9. nice! see, there you go!! have fun at kim’s. thats a great idea. give her a big hug from me, and then have her give you one from me as well. sorry about j. und sorry about missing sac. i hope everything will work out for you, sooner than later!!!! my fingers are crossed and also thank you again for your help yesterday!!!! kiss

  10. Oh San, I really feel for you. Do you have any idea how much longer you have to wait? It must be so frustrating.

    I think you and Kim will have a great time this weekend! Spontenaity is great!

    Thinking about you.

  11. Have a nice weekend with Kim!! I’m sure you guys will have a great time together and no more whining!!!! Everything will work out for both of you in just a few weeks, so look forward to the great times that are ahead of you. Start making plans of what you wanna do once you are finally living together with your schatzis!

    I know it sucks for both of you to be apart from the one you love, but what helped me (especially during the last few weeks/months before we finally moved in together) was the thought of how lucky we actually are!! In just a few weeks you will live together with the love of your life (some people never find that). You don’t live in a 08/15-relationship. Isn’t it exciting to be with someone from a different country with a different cultural background?! Sannie, you are moving to LA soon. Many people dream of that their whole lives and for most of them it will always be just a dream. Sannie, Kim, be happy that your husband/boyfriend is not in the army and is not in Iraq right now (I could never deal with that). Sannie, enjoy the time you have with your family and friends in Germany. Kim, get everything ready for C (maybe you can find out about a German class/work for him/ clean out half your closet for him etc.).

    There are so many more things I could tell you, but I know how tough it is. Maybe it helps a little bit..

    And one more thing: Enjoy the time you have by yourself. Going from one extreme to the other is tough. First Frank and I lived 6000km apart and now we live in a one bedroom condo together…that’s not always easy…. BUT: I love it!! And you will, too! Very soon!

  12. Aww hun, first off ((BIG HUGS)) coming your way!
    I agree with you it is indeed not fair that you guys have to put your life ‘on hold’ and cant be together…sometimes i have no confidence at all in the US immigration system….why not make people that just wanna come and live in the US wait a little longer for their VISA’s? But no, instead they take a husband and wife and make them be apart….it makes me so angry! You guys should be together!!

    My fingers are (and have been) crossed that this will be over soon and you can be with J. :-)
    Sending tons of positive thoughts! Enjoy your time with Kim!!

  13. well, what else can i say that wasn’t said before? i really HOPE and AM CROSSING MY FINGERS that you & j., kim & c, can be together soon. it’s already taking forever, which is ridiculous, cause you are married and apart for so long! and even without being married, there should be a way to live together. i wish you & kim a good weekend together, i like the point too that you quarter your problems :). all the best for you! *biiiig hug*

  14. All seasons of FRIENDS? Are you sure you are just gonna be staying for the weekend? Well, have lots of fun and enjoy Bremen.

    I also can’t wait for you to move to L.A. I’ve never been there and that gives me a reason to fly over there. :o)

  15. Ugh. Change is hard. I hate leaving places, even when the place I’m going to is supposed to be “better”. I just hate leaving. Period.

  16. I know how you feel! I´m glad that you will spend the weekend with Kim. I bet that´s gonna be so much fun for you too! And I bet it will make you guys feel a lot better. So enjoy it! (P.S.: I´m thinking about getting all the friends seasons, too =D )

  17. Have a great weekend with Kim! How far is the visa process now? I hope it doesn’t take too much longer!!! *hug*

  18. Thanks for letting me know about the pics – for some reason they look fine on my computer…but i will try to fix the problem ;-)

    Maybe one of these days I will do a seperate post about the whole peppermint story hehe

    Cant wait for your SPF!!

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